minor rant

Outlook keeps "eating" dates that I've entered into the calendar at work . . . so not cool!

smell of burning wood

we woke up this morning to a thin blanket of smoke this morning. apparently winds have pushed the smoke from the wildfires in south Georgia all the way up to Atlanta, and even a little further northeast here in Watkinsville (and Athens).

we need rain in all of Georgia.

and we're back

now that the Radiant blog is up and running, it's just going to be easier to run things off of one account (yay, Google!). I'll be moving posts over soon. I hope. :-)

Gilmore Girls is ending for good tonight, and I'm not sure how I feel about that yet. maybe too many television relationships have taken their toll . . .

I'm heading up to Nashville for a long weekend next friday, and I just wish it was sooner. I need to get out of town and chill. (no drama this time . . . please!?)

six months

it’s astounding how much or little can change in six months. for me, there’s been alot of change. so much so in fact, that sometimes I don’t recognize myself. it’s only for a moment of course, but it’s true. I was so afraid, so anxious all the time. not so much now. after my grandmother died I finally forgave myself for some things. I’d asked God for forgiveness, asked other people for their forgiveness, but never considered forgiving myself. then one night I finally did. and then I changed a little bit. just a shift, which wouldn’t seem like much, but sometimes that half-step changes the entire piece.

(thud)

is the sound of my bag hitting the floor.

it’s been busy this week! busy is good . . . busy means that time goes quickly . . . busy also means that I have a list of people I need to call back in my free time.

it’s funny to think that this time last year I was working on my Exit show, trying NOT to have a nervous breakdown. that weekend was insane.

I’m trying to get little things ready for the Craft Fix this weekend at COTN . . . hopefully it will be the start of some new things for the women at the church. if enough people are interested, we can start offering some topical Art classes or workshops. this summer I want to try out a more open study format for Radiant Women. one of the books that I would love to offer doesn’t seem like it would work as well for a weekly study as it would for a monthly or three-week study. but it’s a great book, and I think it would be really helpful for some of the younger women. plus, it’s summer . . . who wants to have your weeks booked solid in the summer?? summer in Georgia usually leaves me inclined to find the coolest cave possible and stay there until it’s over . . .

tired

yesterday was the funeral for someone I used to know. she was this wonderful, beautiful woman named Kari who was married to a friend who I’ve know for about as long as I can remember. her death was sudden, and during sleep. she took with her their unborn child as well. as sad and horrible as this might seem to some, she is Home. Kari had these awful seizures, and it was one of those that sent her spirit to Heaven last week. we were all together at the Women’s conference the night before, and it wasn’t until noon the following day that most of us found out. not everyone took it well, or at least at first. I’m not going to go into some of what happened later that day . . . I’m still trying to understand it myself. the leadership of the conference dedicated the last service to her. it was beautiful, full of dancing and worship, just like her.

life keeps going. we said goodbye to two women over the last seven days . . . my aunt and my friend are with the Father.

it’s been a long week, and I’m so tired . . .

the conference

last thursday I left my house a little before 5am (yeah) to head up to Fort Mill, SC for the MorningStar “Women in the Kingdom” conference. it was wonderful. truly awesome. and, as I found out later, it was put together by women who “don’t really like women’s ministries and don’t even really like women.” which makes total sense to me. until recently, most of my friends were guys. I didn’t grow up with any sisters, so I just don’t get that whole thing. and the “typical” female behaviors used to drive me up the wall. all this makes it seem strange I guess that I volunteered to lead a women’s group, right? yeah, I wasn’t asked, I asked them. but I guess maybe that’s why it works, because some of us are tired of the cute (nothing wrong with cute), and want something that’s different. something where we can dig in and say “that snake is MINE, hand me my hoe” and hack the thing to pieces.

anyway, it was a great conference and I feel like I learned alot. not to mention faced some things that I had allowed to stop me from go after things in my life. still it makes me wonder . . . why havn’t some of the others who have been going up there for other conferences brought back the knowledge and skills to pour back into the church here. that baffles me.

trying it out

I'm moving the blog (maybe temporarily, maybe not) here.

-Meredith

(ouch)

it's monday and my head is throbbing . . . probably because of the 9.2 pollen count? I love spring around here, but we need a nice rain shower.

yesterday I went to a dirt bike race . . . it was awesome. this one was an endurance race, so it was about finishing, not finishing first. a couple of my friends' husbands race, so we girls would drive around and meet the guys at the fuel and reset stops. it was so much fun. it was also cool to see the guys being guys . . . reminded me of when I read Wild at Heart.

eeek!

Pastor Rick linked me on his blog . . . at least Jessi is sharing this boat . . .

ok, so I've never been one of those people who was excited about exercising. for one thing, it takes nothing for me to break a sweat. so who knew I'd be one of those people who gets hooked on the post-workout endorphin kick? I've started walking with a friend of mine after work. we're both not to the running point yet, so we go at least half an hour and then do other things on the days when we can't meet. it's GREAT! the mornings after the workouts I feel fantastic - all bright and shiny.

Radiant Women is also great. we're taking it easy in March, which has become the new June, if all of the weddings and baby showers are any indication. the events will kick back into gear in April after Easter. oh, and that reminds me . . . this whole (rather poorly done) "documentary" thing that James Cameron did . . . really. is that all he's got? if you're going to spend all of that time and money trying to debunk a faith then you should at least pick something that might actually possibly work. seriously.

at work we're reading A Celebration of Discipline right now. it's pretty good so far topically. there are some (mostly contemporary) authors that drive me a little crazy with their writing styles, and right now this author is one of them. it's a personal thing . . . I'm one of those oddballs who reads things like Mere Christianity as much for fun as study of the faith. his content is wonderful, it's just the written delivery that I'm trying to sort through. maybe the later chapters will be better . . .

RELEVANT has been having this HUGE moving sale, so I bought a bunch of books that I've been wanting to read. now that I've ordered it, I keep seeing references to G.K. Chesterfield's Orthodoxy everywhere! I really hope that order arrives soon . . .

fun with iPods . . .

this is the soundtrack of your life game:

Opening Credits: "Sin Ella"- The Gipsy Kings
Waking Up: "Time That Bald Sexton" - Danielson
First Day At School: "Beneath Still Waters" - Emmylou Harris
Falling In Love: "Out of the Woods" - Nickel Creek
First Kiss: "Chant" - The Katinas
Fight Song: "Cold" - The Cure
Breaking Up: "This Love" - Stavesacre
Prom: "In a Graveyard" - Rufus Wainwright
Life: "Jenny was a friend of mine" - The Killers
Mental Breakdown: "Butterflyz" - Alicia Keys
Driving: "Baby Sister" - Damien Rice
Flashback: "Fields Of Gold" - Sting
Getting Back Together: "Feeling Good" - Nina Simone
Wedding: "So Simple" - Alicia Keys
Birth of Child: "Ice Cream" - Sarah McLachlan
Final Battle: "Rivers Underneath" - Stavesacre
Death Scene: "It'll All Work Out" - Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers (Elizabethtown)
Funeral Song: "Oh! Sweet Nothin'" - The Velvet Underground (High Fidelity)
End Credits: "It Is Well With My Soul" - Jennifer Knapp

wow, it's been over a month since that last post . . . oops.

ok, so here go the updates . . . .

my new job? fabulous. I like them, they like me, and I get to be creative. (insert happy dance) and, OK, I figured working in a church office would be busy, but I didn't know it would be as busy as it is. crazy.

my social life is sorta on hold. not entirely mind you, but I've been working on all of the catch-up, fix-up, and straighten-up details in my life, and that takes a while. being an artist I tend to collect things, even when I don't have a place for them. so I've been making places and getting rid of the unnecessary, which is coming along great, although not in a weekend.

I'm leading/coordinating a women's ministry in my church for the 20s & 30s age ladies. I kept missing the community we used to have, and we needed one at COTN, so with the time I have now that I have this new job . . . voila. if you can't find it, make it. right?

anyway, I have more boxes to go through . . .

wait a minute

I'm hoping that this week goes by quickly. it's my last one before I start my new job on the 2nd (nice way to start the new year, huh?), and I'm really glad because I'm not sure that I could take much more of this one. but God knew that. going postal on the few hippies and and New-Agies that come into the shop wouldn't be a good thing. for that matter glaring at the older men who think that it is necessary to explain to me the plot of Jurassic park wouldn't be good either. (hey, I saw that move WHEN IT CAME OUT!) I just have to put up with this until saturday, and then I'm done. DONE!

all I need . . .

some really great things have been happening, and I'll be sharing more shortly, but for now enjoy this video I found on YouTube. it's an old friend and one of my favorites of his songs . . .

interlude

well, the instructions from a recently completed project are on their way, but not quite ready yet. for now I'll just say that I'm exhausted. I'm also waiting to hear back about a job. from all appearances it looks like it could be really great. it would also be a reason to stick around Athens for a while yet. and give me more flexibility to travel.

glory glory to ol' georgia

ok, so you won't hear that much about football on here from me. HOWEVER, I have to say that a certain play this afternoon was quite impressive. one of our linebackers reached into a PILE of players and snatched out the fumble made by Tech, and then proceded straight to the goal line. ok, so he dove in and got himself called out for it, but still. even better though is that Tony Taylor is an Oconee boy. Warriors make great Bulldogs.

give em all a big fat lip

so I guess I'll explain the previous post first. I went up to Nashville for a few days two weekends ago. which seems crazy that it was that long ago and that I'm writing about it NOW, but whatever. the YouTube video is of the in-store MuteMath did at Grimey's saturday evening. it was great, especially considering that I was standing on the back porch with the other fans who didn't show up an hour early. but I got the cd signed, so it's all good. the next day we went back to Grimey's to see another in-store. this time it was a band called the Black Keys. rather Hendrix-esque, but don't let the music fool you - it's a couple (yes, two!) of white guys (as in, not even TAN) from Ohio. they're really good. later that night we headed over to City Hall. which is a cool venue b-t-w, but why call it that? crazy. anyway, the main event was the MuteMath show, which opened with Club of Suns. Club of Suns is a glam-rock band, which is fine if you know that. however, for the unprepared it's just bizarre . . . and they throw glittery confetti at the audience. next up was Jonezetta, who won me over immediately back in Athens, so dancing to their set was a blast. plus lead-singer Robert had a little fan posse in the front, so that was cute. following them and preceding MuteMath was The Whigs, who performed wonderfully, despite most of the audience not knowing any of their songs. actually, they had managed to win most of the crowd over by the end of the set. and then came MuteMath . . . incredible. this had to have been the best show I've been to. I tend to rate these things on the total package, the atmosphere in the crowd, etc. it was fantastic. unbelievable. and I was at the 40watt show! so if you get a chance, go see this band. seriously.

monday I finally got to see Rachel, and we all went out to lunch before we headed back down to Athens. it was really great, but now I keep thinking about moving back to Nashville. but not for a year or so. AT LEAST.

peculiar people

what I did this weekend:

crazy

I love the holidays, I can't help it. I grew up watching my grandmother decorating for every holiday that had a theme. she had rotating art collections for each one and the seasons for crying out loud! and Christmas is my favorite - the history & meaning, the events, the look, food.

I'm already planning dishes for Thanksgiving and pulling out books for Christmas. I can't help it.

my grandmother

Biography of Gretta Moll Dewald

Gretta was born October 26, 1929 at Kutztown, PA of Dr. Lloyd A. Moll and Olga Wuchter Moll.

Early in World War II they moved to Atlanta where her father was assigned, as a Naval Officer, to assist the Commandant of the Navy's V12 program at Georgia Tech. After the war, he organized and developed what is now Southern Polytechnic State University (then, Southern Tech, a remedial program to prepare returning veterans to enter Tech). He later served as President of Middle Georgia College in Cochran, then Georgia Southwestern College in Americus, where he retired from the Georgia University System. Subsequently, he retired from the Navy Reserve as a Captain.

Gretta graduated from Atlanta Girls High in 1946, then Agnes Scott College in 1950. She taught 4th/5th grade Geography and History at Eastman, GA in 1950/51, then 10th grade English at Atlanta Bass High in 1951/52.

She married Charles Dewald at St. John's Lutheran Church in Atlanta December 20, 1951. They now have five children and seven grandchildren. They were very active in the North Decatur Presbyterian Church during the late ‘50's, through the ‘60's and ‘70's while their children were growing. Gretta was a teacher, Superintendent of the Sunday School, organized the Children's Choirs, an occasional soloist in the Adult Choir, and the 2nd woman chosen by the congregation to be an Elder. She was active in Decatur's Winona Park Elementary School's PTA and library; Indian Guides; Scoutmaster of a Girl Scout Troop – all while raising five children and getting involved in Politics.

Gretta's first involvement was Ray Cunningham's (a family friend) campaign for Decatur City Councilman in the early/mid ‘60's – he lost. After that, she was one of the organizers of the Democratic Women of DeKalb. She became active in the Democratic Party of DeKalb; then became its President. In the late ‘60's, she, along with Marge Thurman and others, re-wrote the State Party's by- laws.

During the late ‘60's and through the ‘70's, the Dewald house on Kodiak Drive in Sagamore Hills was the largest house available to the Democratic Women of DeKalb, so it was used for a number of their functions. When Shirley Chisholm, Congresswoman from New York City, ran for President in 1972 (the first black woman to do so), the group decided to put on a reception for her when she came through Atlanta since no other group offered. They chose our 5-level house. No one anticipated the result. Well over (300) people signed the guest book, some from as far away as Miami. An estimated (250) were still waiting when she arrived late. Charles was concerned about the strength of the structure. The lowest level is a 17' x 42' playroom. It was packed. She was a small person, so she took off her shoes and stood on top of our pool table to address the crowd. Meanwhile, traffic on Kodiak Drive, a suburban cul-de-sac street about 1/4 mile long, was completely blocked. Neighbors could not get to or out of their drives. Police arrived twice to get it cleared, but were not successful.

Gretta's involvement with Jimmy Carter started in 1970. Her father, Dr. Lloyd Moll - President of Georgia Southwestern College in Americus, called and suggested that she consider working in Carter's gubernatorial campaign ( the opposition called him "Jimmy WHO?" ). Dr. Moll had been an education resource/mentor to state Senator Carter who had been assigned to the Senate Education Committee of Georgia's legislature. Gretta became very active in the DeKalb County campaign. Subsequently, the large DeKalb voter turnout for Carter was a notable factor in his victory.

In 1972, Governor Carter nominated a slate of Georgia Delegates for the Democratic National Convention in Miami. Gretta was not among them, so she chose to run against one of Carter's nominees (Horace Tate) and won – the only successful challenge to Carter's nominees.

Gretta actively campaigned to establish MARTA, and then served on the MARTA Board as a representative of DeKalb County from 1975 into 1977. One of the original MARTA cars carried a brass plate honoring ‘Gretta M. Dewald' as a MARTA Board Member.

During the run-up to the 1976 Presidential Campaign preliminaries, Gretta arranged to have Senator "Scoop" Jackson of Washington, Representative Paul Simon of Illinois – both prominent potential presidential candidates – along with Governor Jimmy Carter and Senator Herman Talmadge of Georgia at the same head table in the Plantation Restaurant on Memorial Drive for a Democratic Party of DeKalb function. The state party was very frustrated because they were "scooped".

When Carter started his Presidential Campaign for the 1976 Democratic Nomination, he organized the Peanut Brigade. Gretta became a team leader who would fly into a city, rent a car and take a team into an assigned neighborhood to canvass door-to-door for votes. She visited, among others, Tallahassee, Milwaukee, Chicago, Cleveland, and three New England states. She was Co- Chairperson of the DeKalb County campaign. Jimmy's mother, Lillian Carter, was the key ‘draw' for a reception at our house.

Our family attended Jimmy's January 1977 inauguration. Gretta was told by Rosalyn that she was on several ‘interesting lists'. Later that year, Rosalyn called and asked her to come to Washington and be the Chairperson - Women's Division of the Democratic National Committee. The male-oriented DNC provided very little funding for the Women's Division, so Gretta spent her own money on a program of seminars she planned and conducted around the country to train women to run for office. Also, she often worked with or for Rosalyn, traveling with her or sometimes filling in for her at speaking engagements.

After Carter lost re-election in 1980, and Manuel Maloof was elected Chairman of the DeKalb County Commission, Gretta was asked by Manuel to return to Atlanta and become his Executive Assistant. Manuel utilized her as his ‘chief of staff', having all department heads report in through her to him. Normally, she implemented his plans and orders. She served from January 1981 until early in 1989 – the longest serving, and only woman Executive Assistant in DeKalb's history.

In 1988(?), she was one of those named and honored as ‘Women of Achievement' by the Metropolitan Atlanta YWCA. There were numerous other awards and recognitions.

In 1989, Gretta was asked by DeKalb's judges to organize and manage the ‘Pre-Trial Release Program' for the DeKalb Court System, reporting to the judges. She did so until retiring at the end of 1994.

In 2004, Georgia State University Library requested and received Gretta's records and papers – some (195) file boxes. In 2005, they staged an event honoring Gretta and thanking her for the gift to their Women's Collection.


written by Charles F. Dewald

My grandmother passed away early this morning. She had been suffering from Alzheimer's for a while now, and over the last few months it had grown progressively worse. Some of the family had gathered to celebrate her 77th birthday this last Saturday evening. I don't know whether she knew we were there, but we were able to see her. She was an incredible woman.

popularity

MUTEMATH keeps getting better every time I see them. the first time I saw them wasn't really on purpose, even though they were headlining. I went because a friend of mine was opening for them. last night though was off . . . the . . . HOOK! The Whigs performed wonderfully as local boys should, and the surprise was the first of the opening acts - Jonezetta. I'm sure if I go through my old issues of RELEVANT there will be a article about them somewhere, because I know I've heard of the name prior to this tour, but I can't remember when or where exactly.

as this is the third time MUTEMATH has played Athens in less than two year, I'm sure that they'll be back again soon. there seems to be a mutual affinity between the band and the town. go figure. interesting too that a band who sounds the way they do came from New Orleans. very cool.

crashing down

(sorry Mat!)

so the ceiling at work caved in last night. not ALL of it, but I good chunk of sheetrock and insulation was on the floor when I opened the door this morning. My boss had called me last night as I was heading to the cast party for South Pacific to warn me about what I'd see when I came to work the next morning. as I found out from the building manager this morning, a pipe had burst in the apartment above, flooding both that space and the store below. we had thought it was the tenants up to their flood-inducing keggers. so this time it wasn't. at least not entirely.

so today I watched more soggy pieces of sheetrock and chunks of insulation crash to the floor as the maintenance guys ripping them out of the ceiling. when I wasn't wondering if they were going to fall off the ladder it was kinda entertaining. and we actually had some decent sales too.

how was your monday? ;-)

winding road

ok, so I'm pensive. not that it's anything new . . .

I am having an amazing time performing in South Pacific. it's fantastic. not that I haven't flubbed a few dance steps, but it's still great anyway.

I keep thinking about what I want to write, what I want to say in my music. I must be over-thinking it, because I don't remember it being this hard before. but when you realize how much you cared what people though, you get a little self-conscious about what you're saying. I guess. still working that out. still working alot of stuff out actually.

I don't know where I'm going with any of this, and I have another performance tomorrow, so I'd better get some sleep . . .

here it goes again

it was impressive enough as a no-cuts, one shot video . . . and then they did it live . . .

I don't want to be

the internet just isn't that interesting.

there comes a point when stuck at work with little to do that you just can't read another blog, or another news site, or window shop (ha!) another website. and I want to get out of here so that I can go work on things at home. oh, and THEN there's the continuing quarter-life crisis thing. should I go to grad school? that feels like postponing the inevitable. quit this job and temp again? find another job period? move to another city? having choices and opportunities is a good thing, but it doesn't make it easy.

I hate moving. the thought of trying to move the studio contents ALONE is daunting enough. it's great in that the process forces you to get rid of accumulated random objects, but I still hate it.

oh, and why is it that it's the rednecks who want grills "like for your teeth"? I thought that was a hip-hop thing.

random thoughts

(yes, still a song title!)

I freaked out Walter (old guy who chases people with his wheelchair Downtown) or he's just the new Rumpelstiltskin. say "hello, Walter" as you pass him on the sidewalk (before he tries to get money out of you) and he'll leave you alone. or at least that day anyway.

the two podcasts that I enjoy have been MIA this week - RELEVANT & Grey's Anatomy. what gives?

finally . . . my mom is fine, so thanks for the prayers. she was rushed to the ER monday night. I'm not going to go into the details, but everything is fine. she's just been rather worn out the last few days. I will say that my Pastor's wife is fantastic. she came and helped out tuesday with some follow-up doctor's visits. I've known of pastor's wives who coordinate other people in the church to take care of that, but rarely do it themselves. she volunteered.

that's all for tonight . . .

honey bun

South Pacific opens next week at The Morton Theater (Downtown Athens on Washington Street). ACT is producing it. for the cast list and such click here. it's running friday and saturday the first weekend (Oct. 13 &14), and thursday through sunday the next weekend (Oct. 19 - 22).

it's going to be alot of fun, so you should totally come. PLUS . . . there are UGA home games BOTH WEEKENDS . . . *wink wink, nudge nudge*. come on, you know you want to come!

Bring the Pain

I just got home from rehearsal and my legs HURT. not in subtle way, but in an obvious "I don't want to walk" kind of way. and it's awesome.

why?

because once I'm working out, it's ok. getting started is where I have the troubles. so between running all over Downtown and dance rehearsals, I might start getting in shape yet. bring the pain . . .

All I Need

this title is one from a song that I friend of mine wrote. it also happened to close the season premiere of Grey's Anatomy tonight. the song is a favorite of mine, and seeing Mat doing this (from a distance) brings joy in a way that I can't really explain. it's a personal thing, but when I watch my friends out doing what they love and succeeding at it at the same time - I couldn't be happier. maybe because I've also watched as people I loved threw everything that they dreamed of away.

the last few months I've been thinking alot about what I want to do now. I've been applying for jobs, thinking about grad school, cleaning out/organizing my studio . . . alot of thought and alot of prayer. I'm an artist , and I always have been. BUT . . . I haven’t been able to get really excited about it. not enough to make it my career. it's something I've always done, and I'll always do, but I've felt like it wasn't the main thing. it sounds crazy, right?

so I recently auditioned for a musical. I hadn't sung in front of anyone in several YEARS, and I hadn't auditioned in what, five at least? the audition was terrifying, I locked me throat up and threw my timing off, but Tom (the director) saw through it or just took a chance. rehearsals have been a re-learning curve to say the least. it's hard and I'm having to really work at it, and I love it.

and then a couple of days ago it started to hit me - I didn't have to work at Art. not much. and that sounds conceited, but it's true. it came just easily enough that I didn't have any real motivation to work any harder. I loved it, but it just wasn't enough of a challenge. music has always been different. I love it, but most of the time I'm picking apart every little moment. if I didn't have to work on the pieces then I had stage fright to compensate for. and when that was ok then I had new pieces to work on. it challenges me and terrifies me. I love being on stage, in rehearsals, and in writing sessions. for three years I left it behind and focused on a degree, but now I have to try to make THIS work. I'll still be using the jewelry torch, and the sewing machine, and the paints, but I can't leave music behind again.

so that's where I'm at.

Back In The Saddle Again

I auditioned for the ACT production of South Pacific this week, and I made it. it was the first time that I had auditioned for anything in four years. maybe five. so yeah, I was a nervous wreck, but I knew once I did it I'd be fine, and the next one will be just like any other audition (back when I was auditioning all the time). I just wanted to be back in, and to be performing again. anything really, because it would give me the extra motivation to get my voice back in shape and my head back into performing. so being on stage? fabulous. not a problem. alot of faces out there is easier for me than two. the worst part is over, and now I get to have fun. and you may think I'm crazy, but I even love the rehearsals, the required set painting, the striking . . . all of it.

and I found more of the floor and the tabletops in my studio today.

Simple Pleasures

it's the little things in life . . .

"The United States Postal Service issued a new set of commemorative stamps depicting classic motorcycles. Unfortunately, the USPS forgot to spell-check the final version of the collector's items, because they misspelled a keyword, marking the stamps "motorcyle." Upon hearing this, RELEVANT copyeditor Tia Stauffer went postal ...9/1/06 | 2:48 PM"

that make me happy.

I <3 slices . . .

fight song

I'm going all Grey's A & titling my blog entries with song titles . . . or we'll see how that works anyway . . .

UGA beat Western Kentucky today . . . *gasp*, "really???" . . . shocker. but "yay" none the less.

Pat has a new layout on his blog, so I got curious as to new templates, thus the new look of this one. (darn you!) but now all of my links are gone, so I'll have to redo them. they needed updating anyway.

I have some new projects I'm working out, and I'll soon be sharing the plans here. just a few more details to work out first.

growl growl, grumble grumble

tomorrow is the first game of the fall football season . . . . this I am very happy about.

tomorrow means that all of the obnoxious neanderthals, jerks, and drunks will come climbing out of the woodwork, trashing everything everywhere they go . . . this I am not happy about.

go dawgs.

I started reading Searching For God Knows What by Donald Miller, and something occured to me. What if "favor" has nothing to do with what we do on the checklists of our religion? What if has more to do with how we live. And not live in the I tithe, I smile at people, I give to charities around the holidays, etc., etc., but actually live. Going out and doing things, dreaming and then acting on the dream, writing, playing sports with strangers at the park. Because God created us for fellowship with Him, right? A relationship is alot more fun when the other person has a life.

Pirates II

So first they set a record friday as the highest grossing movie on its first day of release, and THEN by having the best opening weekend. Having seen this movie TWICE in twenty-four hours . . . it's awesome. If you can see it in DLP, then do that as well. Also, a second viewing is as enjoyable as the first, if not more so. I enjoyed it more the second time (even though I loved it the first). No spoilers here . . . just go watch it!

Oh, AND I loved that it proved again that . . . .

a. Hollywood is too full of itself: people want to see really good movies, and they'll pay to see them on a big screen. A drop in revenue means that someone's not doing their job, NOT that people are downloading illegally.

b. Critics are irrelevant and out of touch.

three movies to go see . . .

Superman Returns. yes, I loved it! (even with the interesting choice of story lines from the comic book.)

The Devil Wears Prada. I haven’t read the book, but I know that they definitely took some liberties when adapting it to the screenplay. this was to make them nicer or something. anyway, even if you just see it for the clothes, it's great. HOWEVER . . . the characters are great. loved this movie as well!

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. this doesn't need any recommendations. if you saw the first one, then you're probably just as excited as I am. if you aren't . . . then really . . . LIGHTEN UP!!! in the meantime, go find the Black Pearl cereal . . . seriously . . .

coffee cure

I caught this in slices over at RELEVANT :

"A new study has found that drinking coffee can reduce the risk of liver damage. According to the research, “drinking coffee cuts the risk of cirrhosis of the liver from alcohol—by 22 percent per cup each day” …6/13/06 | 5:39 PM"

interesting . . .

family

I went to Atlanta this afternoon with my father to visit my grandmother. She has rapidly progressing Alzheimer’s, and just a few months ago my grandfather made the decision to put her into a care home. He did his best to care for her for as long as he could, but things got to be more the he and the rest of the local family could handle. It's hard seeing her slip away like this. This was the woman who ran Dekalb for years, helped to lead political campaigns, chaired committees, and mothered four sons and a daughter. She was an incredible grandmother as well. Dad just sat there with her, talking to her when she had some good moments, and helping with what he could. When the other ladies in the common room of the home got too boisterous, she sent us on our way.

The best part of the trip though was the ride with my father. The conversations we've had while driving to and from Atlanta are some of my favorite memories. Today's certainly made the trip a little easier.

Downtown life

There's a distinct difference between day life and nightlife in Downtown Athens, and anyone who's seen both knows it. In the day life we get Walter. If you don't know Walter by name, you probably know him as the old guy in the wheelchair. And if you know him by that, then you've probably been chased by him in said wheelchair (or at least yelled at). This guy is like a Twinkie (I'd say cockroach, but that would be offensive) in that it seems like he'll be around forever. Heck, he's been harassing Athens folk for cash and meds since before I was born! My dad has stories from his ER days of Walter's antics. Don't feel too bad for the old guy (Walter, not my dad) though, he gets a nice fat check from the government every month, and someone obviously does his laundry.

If he harasses you too much, just call the cops. They know who you're talking about.

thanks, I needed that

what IS it about a new hair(style) that make you want to go clean out your wardrobe, tackle that remodeling project, and reorganize your life. Maybe it's just a woman thing, or even just a me thing, but I needed it.

why?

because lately I've been in that post-graduation, pre-real job interim funk that happens. It's the "I need a real job to fund my Art and music, but first I have to find one." It'll happen, but right now the schedule is killing my drive (30hours hours days a week - ick).

so today I went to get my hair done, and it looks a-maaaaaazing. AND, it was just the "ok, now lets get everything else in shape" that I needed. so until I hear back about the jobs that I've applied for, I'll be organizing, cleaning out, getting the yard sale ready, making jewelry, writing songs, and wearing out my DVD player (thanks to Netflix!!!)

silly "chicks"

out of three women, not one of them has heard "think before you speak"? I'm talking about the Dixie Chicks. one of them ran their mouth and "accidentally" dissed The View. Ms. Walters was quite proud of how her ladies handled it though, and one of the "chicks" apologized the next day.

now, I don't really care what they think about the president, but this whole "we're done with country, we're rock now." yeah, riiiiiight. I've heard the new single several times, and it's as country as all of the other albums.

silly "chicks"

grad school angst

I have been considering going to grad school. There is even room for me in the program which I'd like to study in starting in the fall of 2007. But here's the thing: I don't know that I want to spend three more years in school (not to mention the money I'll need) on this. I could be continuing on my own work, my music, travel, even living somewhere else. There are so many other possibilities. The angst came last night with a call from my grandfather. He really wants me to get my Master's (or specifically, my MFA) and wants to see a course of study plan, "business plan" for financing the three years, etc. This will all have to wait until the fall, when the professor who will be overseeing my possible degree will be back from Japan. I keep trying to explain that AND that I haven’t made my final decision yet.

biding my time

or "trying to please my true love"

or "thoughts on marriage" from an unmarried single.

For as long as I can remember, I've heard that the first year is the hardest for newlyweds. The reasons varied a bit from couple to couple, but usually involved the adjustments to cohabitation, finances, lifestyle, etc. I lived with a pastor's family for a few months in Nashville, and the couple handled allot of pre-marital counseling for the church. Pre-marital counseling is a very good idea. There are things that couples don't think about during the engagement that can become big issues later on. Also, statistically couples who live together before they get married are more likely to get divorced later on. Often because there are subconscious precedents laid down before they committed to marriage.

I don't want to seriously date anyone who I wouldn't consider marrying. I did it once, and it was a mess. So have I dated much? No. Does that bother me? No. Why? Because the right man for me (one approved by my First love - God) won't be bothered by it either. So I'm biding my time, trying not to waste it on hollow romances. Is my track record flawless? Not really, but whose is?

The idea of a big ceremony scares the crap out of me. Seriously. I can't watch the wedding scenes without going into a near panic. However, after discussing this with my mother and a couple of close friends, the speculation is that the guy I'll end up marrying will want a big ceremony. Greeaaat. I will however be insisting on including power tools in the registry. I doubt he'll have a problem with that.

The actual marriage (one day) is something that doesn't scare me. I know that there will be rough points, as there are in all relationships. There's no such thing as a perfect man or a perfect woman, but if there was that wouldn't be much fun. What "they" say is that well it's the right time and the right person, you'll know. And the right time doesn't always seem like the right time; in fact it can seem like the worst time to be meeting your "match". That's what I've heard.

Oh, and if by chance you've had some dream or word or vision about who I'm supposed to marry, DON'T TELL ME!!! I really don't want to know yet.

who are we really helping?

That's the question that repeats itself over and over again in my mind every time I think about missions trips. I've been on a few. They were all very different, but also usually involved a building or work project, a meal project, and street ministry. Most trips last about a week - not a whole lot of time in the grand scheme of things, right? Most of the time it was the team who was the most affected by the trip. But then again, that's looking at it from a limited time table. Some things take years to develop.

I've been volunteering again at my church helping the wednesday night children's ministry teachers. There are quite a few kids from a nearby trailer park who come to the program. If I hadn't grown up in this particular church, I probably wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the kids. Why? Because not only is this church highly diverse, it also has been working with the kids from the surrounding area for years. The girls that I've been blessed to teach don't isolate themselves, but interact with each other. Not that they don't disagree with who gets most of the purple beads, but that's a minor issue. They really just want the necklace to be long enough, right? :)

Missions work can teach you that YOU are the problem. Until you are actually contributing to change, your long-winded speech is just hollow words. Personally, I think that if everyone got involved, then we'd have other things to talk about. Like what to do with all of the extra time and money we'd have for the community programs (even after the new facilities and equipment were paid for). That would be a good problem to have.

crashing

it's that time again. I am done with school and my brain and body had a staff meeting and decided that the proper course of action was to make me very, very sleepy for an indeterminate period of time.

see you in another week or so . . .

pushing through

Starting with the most recent events . . .

If you've been reading any of the recent posts, you know that I've been trying to beat a nasty little cold virus over the last week. I have a project due tomorrow, and being sick cut into my work time considerably. So this weekend I'm feeling better and make up for lost hours, although not completely out of the cold. Enter mega-migraine. My once EMT father proposed that could have been triggered by sudden drop in pain relievers that I'd been taking for the cold symptoms. That makes sense. I'd be asleep right now, but the caffeine from the med cocktail taken for the migraine has me up and wired (side note: caffeine has been found to boost the effects of pain relievers). So I worked some more on the project. I have no idea if I'll be able to finish with the original plan before tomorrow, but doing what I could tonight has actually made me feel better. Something about my wiring and the fact that doing something creative tends to make me feel better. The "ice pick in my skull" is still there, but less forceful. Oh, and I'd be doing more on the project right now, but it's in the drying stage, so I can't.

How do I start what I'm going to say next? For a little over two years now, I've come to find that I had been suffering from depression. Mild, but depression none the less. I knew something wasn't right, but I wasn't sure what. I figured whatever it was, it was just something to get over. I wasn't having trouble getting out of bed, my friends and family thought things were fine, but I wasn't. Then over the last few months I started coming across article after article about people going through alarmingly similar symptoms. I wasn't looking for these, but it got to the point were I couldn't escape them. So, I sought counsel, did some research, and started on a very mild medication. It was like a light coming on. The anxiety dissipated, the depression lifted, and I had the drive to do the things that I loved again. Oh, and I also survived the final weeks before my Exit. Not that it was all a piece of cake. I still had to face what drove me there in the first place, and the choices that I had made over the last two years. There are things that I wish I hadn't done, but I did, and that can't be changed.

So the important thing is to push through, because it won't be easy, but it will get better.

I would answer my phone, BUT

doing that would require speaking, which makes me feel kinda like I'm choking. ick.

That's how I felt yesterday (all day) and most of this week. Mom was all concerned that I didn't answer when she called. It's this annoying cold. Which, by the way, is going away, but not as quickly as I'd like.

like I had hoped, but better

part of the preparation for the Exit Show/graduation meant putting some things in my life on hold. friends, music, non-research reading, etc. have all been on the back burner until my daily life was focused on more than pending projects. I hoped that I'd be able to pick back up at least somewhere close to where I was before. a little behind or in need of some work and tlc, but there none the less. well, here I am and it's even better than I had hoped. the music is back - I even picked up my guitar more than twice this weekend. still learning, but this time feeling my way along like I do with the piano, which I've played since I was five. I still plan on learning the technical chord positions, but playing by ear is actually working out pretty well. at least I'm not running over to the keyboard to flesh out a verse. as for relationships, the real friends are still around, picking up where we left off, the ones who maybe weren't so great have drifted off, and people who I haven't spoken to in years are popping up all over the place.

oh yeah, and I'm going through books like crazy.

life can feel like hell, but it's also wonderful, it's comedy, and it's beautiful too.

I didn't get much sleep last night. Too much coffee, too much still running through my head, and a very LOUD thunderstorm. Which freaked out the dog. Come to think of it though, I didn't see my cat until sometime this morning. It was a very good storm though - cool lightning, good thunder, and rain that drowned out everything else . . . obviously very loud overall. I love storms.

So here I am, at work, a little sleepy and a little bored. Good times, right? Yeah.

My friend Mat released his new album Tuesday, and I love it. There's some old stuff, some new stuff, and the photos that make you laugh because you actually know the person in person. I can't help it, and I do the same thing with Steve's albums. When you know the goofier side to them, it takes alot of effort to keep a straight face looking at cover shots. Make no mistake though - I couldn't be prouder of any of them. When you work that hard and that long for what you dream of doing . . . it's just the best. And on the other side, it breaks my heart when friends just give up and settle.

There is wedding stuff everywhere you (ok, I) turn right now. Makes sense, as it's a little over a month until June, and planning is in full gear. I'm just really thankful that I don't have to think about any of that for myself right now. However, the television special on the history and making of wedding cakes was really cool. It was on this morning (possibly for the umpteenth time) and made for interesting viewing while I was getting ready for work. Apparently some French chef was absolutely appalled that the English were pilling sticky buns on the floor and have the bride and groom kiss over the mound of rolls. So he went home and concocted a tiered cake. One even did it out of cream puffs (of course they used a different term for the puffs, being the French). There was also a former ballet dancer (male) who does these incredible sugar flowers that look identical to the real things. There's lots of color layering involved and such. It was all very cool from a sculptural standpoint, but it's still just a cake.

I read Blue Like Jazz (Donald Miller) recently. It's a good read, and very funny at times - more or less so depending on your church background. He recounted several points in his life when he realized "I am the problem" - not nessescarily the world. It's the kind of thiing I think about when I read or hear a debate on politics, issues, etc. It makes me wonder if the energy being put into the camera, blog, or air is the only energy being put towards the "problem". Hmm. The term "losers" comes to mind. I know of some community programs that could use some more volunteers. That seems like a better use of time and energy. Just a thought.

One week later . . .

My Exit Show was a huge success. Even with the Sculpture & Fabric Open House going on downstairs, I had a fantastic turnout on my own. So my friends and colleuges attended, and the feedback has been great. One person even commented that it looked like an MFA show rather than a BFA show. Cool.

Now I'm working on getting everything back in order. I probably would have started on Monday, if there hadn't been a portfolio due on Wednesday.

It's exciting to get everything clean and tidy again after the house looked like a fabric bomb had gone off or something. And with the back yard looking more and more like a rainforest every day, there's a lovely view out of the studio window.

So what else is new? I have a bracelet in Southworks, a juried show that opens in May. Graduation is in May (exciting). You will not find me at the cerimony though. No, I plan on sitting somewhere cool that day. What's the point of sitting through all of that heat when you don't even get to hear your name called? Grad school might be starting for me next fall (2007), unless something else comes up over the next year.

Frozen Key Lime Pie

Frozen Key Lime Pie

1 lime - (1-1/2tsp zest & 3Tbs juice)

1 can (16 oz.) sweetened condensed milk

1 can (6 oz.) limeade, thawed and undiluted

2 cups heavy whipping cream

1 6 oz. graham cracker crust

Combine the lime zest, juice, condensed milk, and limeade in a large bowl. Whisk until thoroughly blended.

In another bowl, beat 1&1/2 cups of the whipping cream until soft peaks form. Add to the lime mixture, and whisk until blended. Next, pour into the piecrust, mounding the center.

Place the pie into the freezer, and let the top set. After an hour, cover the pie with plastic wrap and freeze overnight or until firm.

To serve, remove the pie from the freezer 15 minutes before serving. Beat the remaining cream until stiff peaks form, and use it to top the pie*, if desired. Voila!

* I’ve skipped the whipped cream many times, but do what you like.

life+food = humor

It's raining, I'm bored, and then I surfed over to digs. This particular thread had me in stitches! Sorry, that was lame.

things at the grocery store

What's worse than being sick and having no energy? Being sick, having no energy, and mild insomnia. So instead of stabbing myself with silk pins and sewing needles (or burns from the torch) I'm blogging. Hey, it's monday night and the only thing to watch is pair’s figure skating. WHY does she have rhinestones glued to her FOREHEAD?!? Sorry. I like Israel, but WHY??? They're not even the good ones. They look like the awful plastic ones. Anyway . . .

I was out picking up some things at the grocery store the other day, and turned down the coffee, tea, and cereal isle for a little stroll. What do you my unexpecting eyes fall upon? A very strange sight indeed. There, among the chocolate Luck Charms and pink Fruity Pebbles was something stranger still . . . with the words (and this is a direct quote) "Naturally Sweetened Chocolate Pearl-Shaped Cereal with Pirate-Shaped Marshmallows". Now I've seen my share of pirate's oats and whatever else the store brands try to pass off as name-brand substitutes. This wasn't one of those boxes. There was no cartoonish eye-patched, hook-handed bubble face with a fluffy bird drawn on it's shoulder. No my friends, this was a different pirate entirely. Johnny Depp was staring at me from the front of a cereal box. Captain Jack with his chocolate black pearls and little marshmallow pirates. I wished my dad had been there. So I went for the next best thing and bought a box so that I could see the look on his face. You see, my dad has found it amusing that after years of avoiding mainstream popularity, Depp has tied himself to a Disney franchise. Was the reaction worth the price of the cereal? Yes, it was indeed.

Johnny Depp, on a cereal box as Captain Jack Sparrow, dirty fingernails and all . . . harharharrrrr

I <3 my iPod

I do! I really REALLY do!!!

Seriously though . . . I'm very happy with my investment in that clever little electronic device. Not only do I have my music collection with me (all of it once I finish transferring it all) but podcasts and videos too. A few of you who know me can understand how giddy this makes me. Once I get through this last box of cds I'll post the chain questionnaire that Pat "broke". I'm curious to see how random it turns out.

A word of warning though . . . if you're reading this and you're planning on buying one . . . start putting the music onto your computer NOW. It takes a while.

cozy in January

I've been very (happily, for the most part) occupied lately. I might get into that more in a later post. However, for the time being . . . this is too darn cute. Check out what else they have over at knitty.

not again! (lol)

I thought this year my hands might not look like they had been through a shredder. No such luck. You see, for the last few years I had been working at a store where I handled all of the Christmas décor. Christmas wreaths and garland are hell on the hands when you’re dealing with 100s. But I’m not working there anymore, so I figured it wouldn’t be so bad. A manicure might even look ok, right? Ha! This year it was the files that did it. I’m working on this project right now that requires a lot of filing. Not paper, but smoothing the edges on pieces of silver. The pieces are small enough though that every once and a while the steel file slips and goes right across my knuckles.

Oh well, I can get away with injured hands at the holiday parties . . . I’m an artist! It's amazing what that little phrase lets us get away with when it comes to fashion. ;)

after the rain

This is going to be one of those thoughtful, introspective, maybe even stream of consciousness type of entries.

I love the rain, and even thunderstorms for the matter. It’s something about the ways it pushes everyone inside; how it urges you into cozy nooks, warm fires, deep porches, and favorite pages. And all the while the earth is being fed, the leaves brightened, and the paths and pavements swept clean. It’s the transition before clearing of sky that reveals all in a fresh clarity.

Some people talk about the “rain” periods of their lives as the difficult or sorrowful times in their lives. As for myself, it’s the times before the rain that are the worst. There’s the buildup, the open wounds, the weight of it all. Then comes the period where worst is removed, and areas are cleaned and cleared. What we’re met with then is a clear sky, air that fills the lungs instead of choking them, and earth that is ready to be used again.

Whatever the breaking point, I’ve found myself staring up at a clear sky once again. Only, I didn’t realize that’s what it was until after I’d spoken to an old friend. Whether he’s a muse or an oracle in my life I’m not certain, but I do know that the crossing of our paths always coincides with the writing of music. I love that the mysteries of friendships have the most wonderful and unexpected effects. It’s beautiful. I wasn’t sure that I really wanted the make the phone call. And if this was to be like any other time I’d just get his voicemail, but I took the chance. I’m glad that I did, and now I have a new song to remind me of who I was, who I am, and who I can be.

It’s easy to get caught up in the day to day that happens. All the while you’re waiting, hoping that what you’re dreaming of is going to happen, but still you can forget that this is temporary. It may be dangerous to live in dreams constantly, but it can be hell to live without remembering them. What I do now, what I sacrifice now is for what I know will come in its own time.

Certain people come in and out of lives reminding us of who we are and what truly brings us joy. In gentle ways our focus is redirected, our distractions forgotten. They often have no idea of their intervention. A smile, a conversation, a word, or even a memory will be the catalyst, and we are that to someone else.

Bella is sleeping in her little bed next to my Christmas tree, and I think I’ll find my way into my own.

I received an e-mail from a friend of mine today about an old friend of ours who was almost killed because of an act of pure rage. After headed home from a recording session, he was nearly beaten to death after a minor traffic accident. The other driver was arrested, and one of the reports can be found here. Johnny is one of the most skilled and gifted guitarists I know, and we hope that after this he will be able to play again. Right now, we're praying that he just pulls through. His cousin is a dear friend of mine, and was highly instrumental (no pun intended) in my start into songwriting. There was something almost magic about those guys. Johnny, Steven, and the rest of the family are all in my prayers.

Whether you were a fan of Burlap to Cashmere, Johnny, Steve, or not, please keep them all in you thoughts and prayers. Thanks.

cast of characters

sorry Jaymi, but I'm really bored and the laundry isn't done yet. Oh, and I'm putting off the crochet sample I'm supposed to have for class tomorrow. :) plus, talking (or calling anyone) is out of the question, as my voice is shredded at the moment. I hope this is only a 24hour bug.

ladies first . . . .

"Jenna" - as in Jenna Rink, Jennifer Garner's character in 13 Going On 30. Not because they look alike (well, maybe a little), but because that's pretty much who she is. Love her for it.

"Lorelai" - scary as it may be, that's what the conversations are like between me and her. Just one of the reasons we love the show. She's one of my best friends!

"Andie" - (How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days) she looks more like Jennifer G. (Affleck?), but this is about characters . . . she can hang with the guys like the best of them, they all fall in love with her, she's always there for her girlfriends, and she's always having a great time.

"Gordon" - I'm naming her after my favorite character from one of my favorite movies because I have to her on this list, but I can't think of a single female character she's like. I'll see if we can think of something tomorrow.

and now for the boys . . .

"Chandler" - hey, he's admitted that he is Chandler. This explains itself on so many levels, and I've known him forever . . . .

"Joey" - ok, I havn't seen this guy in a while, but it sealed the deal when the words "how you doin'?" came out of his mouth. He even looks like him. Ten bucks says "Jenna" almost fell out of her chair reading this. ;)

"Keane" - short for Will Keane, Richard Gere's character in Autumn In New York. Smooth, charming, underneath a heart of gold, and trouble . . . . all trouble.

"Will" - except that he was straight, he was Will and I was Grace. When it dawned on both of us it was somewhat alarming. I even had the red hair! I miss him . . .

"Leopold" - if he (the actual character, not the guy) had actually stuck around anyway . . . far too handsome and proper, this guy is lovely but doesn't seem to fit . . .

so these are just a few . . . hope you enjoyed the read ;)

oh, and if anyone knows a real "Ronon", then that's a blind date you can set me up on. Or a "Major Shepard".

why?

So should I just wear heels every day? All the times I've worn them, and never, not once, have I had and injury. However, while wearing "sneakers" I've rolled or twisted both of my ankles. Not at the same time of course, but still. What gives? Stumbed wearing heels, yes (bad sidewalks), but never an injury.

Will & Grace is on and I miss my "Will". We'd both be laughing about my sore ankle right now on his really uncomfortable (but strangely stylish) couch. **ouch**

musically speaking

I was thinking about music again, and the things my brilliant teacher tried to impart to me while she was still alive. It seems like half of singing is finding out how certain things should feel. The way you breathe, the way a sound resonates inside, the openness of the throat, the stance, the alignment of posture. After a time, all of this becomes second nature, almost effortless. Instead of straining for a note, the feeling of that sound compensates for a bad acoustic environment. Or even a day when what you’re accustomed to hearing just isn’t the same.

Keeping in time, on tempo, in the right verse, and working the mood of the crowd is enough without worrying if you’re staying on pitch. Some of the “coolest” rock stars even figured it out. Why suffer from being hoarse and off-key, when some simple vocal training means that your gigs turn out better and you can do more of them without straining the voice? Oh, and the screams turn out louder too.

Thinking about it all makes me look forward to time for training and practice again. I know that I’m out of shape vocally when it takes longer to bounce back from all long night out or a sore throat.

Now if I could just stop pronouncing those Italian songs in French.

ooouuuuuuwwwww . . .

Who needs the gym when you have the studio to give your muscles hell? I had a thorough round with the rolling mill yesterday and my arms having been reminding me all day. Feel the burn, baby.

There's an Opening tonight for some seniors in the Fabric department tonight. There are six of them, and the show looks like it'll be really great. There's a knitted igloo for crying out loud! It'll at least be interesting.

One of the two professors of the Fabric Design department is retiring. We're really going to miss Ed, but he's been here forever and wants to spend more time with his wife. It's sad that he's leaving, but sweet that he's going to do some things that he's been putting off.

Switchfoot is playing tomorrow night at the 40watt and I'm going! As if that wasn't exciting enough, my friend Patrick is coming in from Augusta for the show as well. I haven’t seen him in ages! (years?) It's going to be a blast.

spooky

He's baaAack . . .

My ex-boyfriend has recently decided to pick up communication again. The passive-aggressive kind of course, but a form regardless. It's funny in a sad sort of way. He even thought he could lie again. Silly boy. The "female CIA" has many members and the best agents know to watch each other's backs. Try as he might, he was not successful in retrieving my number.

Is it coincidence that one of my best friends looks like Jennifer Garner? hmmmm . . . ;)

small acts of kindness

Sometimes it's the little things that make a difference. Here is a way that we can help victims of rape. Another way to do what we can.

I really meant to write sooner . . . I did.

I really hate to say this, but Kyan (and whoever said it first) was right . . . a bedroom that’s a disaster is an indication that life is a disaster. Now, being an art student tends to mean that one’s living quarters will be in a state of grand chaos from time to time. Fine. But I can’t take this for extended periods of time anymore. It’s just eerie how much more smoothly things seem to go when my laundry is clean and the floor is vacuumed. It’s not that I was a slob, there was just always a lot of clutter. Just don’t look at the studio. ; )

Elizabethtown is clever, and wonderful in a not over the top sort of way. We laughed through the movie, and it wasn’t because it was crude, crass, moronic, or ridiculous. You know those moments that we’ve all had versions of at some point? The ones that you look back and laugh at? It’s full of those.

I’m still not budging on the dating issue. Life is flexible, but I need to see these commitments through as much for myself as for those people who will one day be a part of my future.

quick note

all is well (enough), lots of new stuff (so stay tuned, so to speak), Elizabethtown is awesome, gay men keep asking me out (yeah, it's odd/funny?) . . . oh, and it's homecoming this weekend.

I'll explain everything later . . .

top five

Here's being honest: I'm a little spent (see entry below) and looking for ways to keep myself occupied other than TV, kleenex, or junk food. So here are some top 5 lists (if you're that bored or curious).

favorite movies that I've watched so many times I've lost track on the count:
1. High Fidelity (ha! irony, no?)
2. Under the Tuscan Sun
3. Pirates of the Caribbean
4. Serendipity
5. Hackers

cities I've been to:
1. Amsterdam
2. Washington, D.C.
3. Haarlem
4. Nashville
5. Iron Town (ok, it was a village, but being in the mountains of Jamaica was just cool)

things I value in my friends:
1. character
2. kindness
3. loyalty
4. sense of humor
5. honesty

things I find attractive in a guy (what I tend to notice physically):
1. eyes (they say alot)
2. smile
3. hair
4. hygene (I'm NOT kidding)
5. height

things that don't bother me in a guy:
1. body type (unless he's over-muscled - that's just gross)
2. hair style (as of recently that even includes dreads, oddly enough)
3. skin color
4. tatoos
5. facial hair

foods:
1. pizza (it gets its own)
2. Japanese
3. Italian
4. Mexican
5. Southern Soul

things that scare me really REALLY bad:
1. the wedding prep scenes from My Big Fat Greek Wedding (and my family isn't Greek or mostly women)
2. escalators (the ones at Hartsfield and Phillips Arena. Ruth can tell you all about it.)
3. snakes
4. heights
5. tests

Kaylee died this afternoon. I'm having a hard time talking about it right now, but I know that some of you would want to know. We're not sure how she got so sick so quickly, but she was a wonderful pet. It's hard right now.

-Meredith

public service note

Due to the volume of e-mails that my little brother and his friends are sending about (and to me apparently) I'm posting this link.

http://hoaxbusters.ciac.org/

If it seems too good to be true . . . that's right, it probably IS. I've been sending this particular link to all the e-mails on the forwards, but posting here couldn't hurt.

AOL & Microsoft are not going to send you a check, ok? :)

it didn't rain, but we flooded

Sometime around 4:30 this morning my cat woke me up wanting who knows what. That's not unusual for her. However, in my semi-concious state I noticed that my door was closed, but the lights were on out in the hall. Slightly unusual at that hour, but whatever. Then more lights came on. Next thing I know, mother is telling me that the basement is flooded because the new water heater that was installed yesterday was defective. So we spent the next few hours downstairs moving stuff and using the shop vacs to suck water out of the basement and carpeting in the den. We got most of it up, and there's a shiny new de-humidifier sitting downstairs helping us out.

That was the monday morning adventure this week.

It seems like I'm crying all the time now. For a while nothing made me cry, and it almost scared me. I'd want to, but it was like I was so numb that I couldn't. I had been pushing away everything that was hurting me for so long that I just couldn't express anything anymore. It was awful, and also happened to be around a couple of the most difficult, painful years I've known thus far. Anyone who met me in the year after I move back got to know me during the worst couple of years or so of my life. Only they probably didn't know that because there were things that I just couldn't talk about. The fact that some of the friends are still around says alot about who they are.

So now, I'm a basket case when Extreme Makeover: Home Edition comes on, when the girls get together like we used to, or when I admit that I'm just a little bit overwhelmed.

On the other hand, emotional releases tend to mean that I'm much more relaxed and happy the majority of the time. Which I have been. I just still have alot going on right now, and alot of things to take care of.

(quote)

"This life is not about what one can do to make his or her bank account larger, or even beating yourself over the head for having a privileged life. It is, however, about making a difference in the lives of those who do not have hope. I have been blessed with a life of abundance, and it is now my job to go out and share that abundance with those who do not have it." -Bethany Ruth Brown

So you're where you are for a reason. You shouldn't fight it, but be thankful for it, and watchful of how it can benefit others as well.

Just a thought.

live & learn

I did it. Well, almost.

As of tomorrow (or the following day) I will have read all of the currently published Harry Potter novels. Yes, all of them. Some of my friends reading this might be ready to start lecturing about all sorts of dangers. However, having READ the books . . . the Left Behind series is more dangerous. Seriously. Sorry, hate to break it to you, but it's true. Harry has some decent morals, aside from some typical adolescent issues. But honestly, I remember youth group, and we weren't much better. Remember the giant frog and the pastor's toilet? (well, ok . . . IN) We even had the fireworks! Patrick should remember this, I think he actually did it. I distinctly remember chasing the frog around the grounds with half the team.

The whole uproar in the Christian community a while back over these books seems to be a pattern of late. Everyone gets all freaked out over a STUPID argument, gets all distracted, and goes on a witch hunt. (yes that was intentional) The point is, Tolkien and Lewis had people running around doing "magic" in their stories and no one seems to have a problem with it.

I got caught up in the whole thing as well a few years back. But then again, I was also caught up in a certain organization that was a LITTLE over the top about some things. The books are not for everyone, but they're not a threat.

Now, go be nice to your neighbor . . . NOW. :)

reading

I'm finishing up a couple of books, including one that I started to read six(?) years ago. Wow, it has been that long. oops! This one book is titled The Power of Femininity by Michelle McKinney Hammond. Some of what she's got to say is really good, some a little "?" and so forth. It goes into warnings about how women has the capacity to influence men into things that turn out really REALLY badly. She's not one of the modern feminists (i.e. all men are scum and must be crushed), but more along the lines of yes, women and men are very different, but the bot sexes have alot to bring to the table because of this. That's some of what I remember from the last time I read any of it.

Also up is Tolkien and C.S. Lewis: The Gift of Friendship by Colin Duriez and The Small Rain by Madeleine L'Engle. The novel By L'Engle is the first of two books. I didn't realize this until well into the second one.

I finished Walk On: The spiritual Journey of U2 by Steve Stockman recently, and it's a great read if you're a fan.

(venting)

I just stumbled across something . . . and it really makes me want to tell the jerk off. Why did I ever let him kiss me EVER? The guy is stating to all the world that there was never even anything going on.

But I saw Serenity tonight, and it was great. Well worth the wait. Borrow or rent the series (Firefly) and go see the movie. Trust me, it's well worth it, especially if you enjoy anything remotely sci-fi. Or just fiction for that matter.

journal

I don't know what to call this one, but it's going to come out like a journal entry I suppose.

Let's start with the past week. Intense would be an appropriate descriptive. But then again, I'm sitting here typing this fighting off another migraine, so it could also be a theme. Second one in a week. The spiritual tides have become increasingly noticeable lately, which confirmed my suspicions as to why my body craved certain foods (proteins mostly) over the last week. When you go into warfare mode, it happens. It's amazing what we can go through without actually realizing what's happening. I heard this one pastor say over and over that he was one of those who believed that there wasn't one, but a thousand demons behind every bush. Well, if that's true, then
there are at least twice as many angels around. I think we're covered. Not that we should be foolish, but the outcome has already been settled. Just think of the interim as a series of tasks to be completed.

And then there's school. It's great, but more of a challenge now in different ways. As much as self-expression is harped on, one of my professors basically told me mine was wrong. "Your work is a little quiet, I want to see it louder." What? That's the point of this period in my work. The contemplative aspect, the attention to relational aspects, and how I'm interpreting them. I'm going to paraphrase another professor in "shocking is overdone." What if we're so shocked that we've forgotten how to feel? So exposed that nothing affects us anymore? If I could, I'd spend time every evening sitting on the beach with nothing but waves and wind. For now the woods are my ocean.

This weekend was wonderful, from seeing friends friday night, sleeping in saturday morning, and so much fun with more friends last night (although I may have overdone some of it). The Bearfoot Hooker shows are just so much fun. There was dancing upstairs and down. Now, it was a bit of fight to get to church this morning (headache and all), but well worth that.

get off your high horse and give us a hand

Opinions like this make me mad. Why? Because they're counter-productive in a really bad way.

Now, I havn't seen the new Amy Grant hosted show, but I have watched more than a few Extreme Makeover: Home Edition programs, and that this guy thinks that they're worthless because some companies get great rating and advertisment is so ridiculous. So what? Does it really matter when the REAL pay-off is that a little girl's future health (oops, sorry . . . LIFE!) is spared and her family is given back what they sacrificed so that she could have a shot? And what about the single parents who took in kids who had no future, but were packed into 2 bedroom houses (we're talking about 9 people here)? The ones who turned their personal tragedies into a motivation to help others?

If you're going to preach about giving privately and without fanfare, then you need to be practicing that in your own house. Christians have got to stop persecuting those who do things to help others. It makes us look the fool. So what if the motivation is a little off at first? That can change. The point is helping others, and the people EMHE picks seem to be the ones who were helping others to begin with, even when they had nothing.

underwater basket weaving

no, I'm not kidding.

Homework/study session at Katie's and Nicole's. Bring your bathing suits, and whatever you didn't finish today in class. We also need to discuss the trip to IKEA to pick up more chocolate crisps. A's all around sounds great, so a few cases should be enough to ensure it.

pleasant distractions

Ok, so there's this grad student on campus who I met over a year ago through some friends. Good looking, very nice, but super shy around women. His friends have told me that he doesn't think the ladies find him attractive. Fast forward to today. Sitting in a spot downtown working on some things for school and he walks by . . . and I lose all mental capacity for a minute there. So it's a officially a crush now? Yes, I think so. Now if we can only get him to talk.

This is the harmless drama I don't mind dealing with. :)

Mutts & Bella

I have the kitty version of that dog. Except that she doesn't stop with people.

not so much a recap?

Well, the weekend was . . . strange. A mix of good and bad, a meltdown, followed by 24 hour bug or something that felt like my brain was going to force open my skull, and other random oddness. ugh.

However . . . the Bulldogs won, I got a sunday off on a day that I was really glad that I didn't need to leave church early, and I have a ticket for the (almost sold out) Switchfoot show at the 40watt in November. Life isn't bad.

Oh, yeah, and I have chocolate cookies . . . yay!

Things That Make Me Happy Volume . . .

I'm borrowing the title from one of my favorite sites, but I doubt that they'll mind. That phrase just makes me happy (or smile).

So it's after midnight and I'm waiting for the washer to finish so I can hang some things to dry and go to bed (dryers are wonderful, but not for everything). At least the silk skirts dry quickly. Anyway, I found something the other day, something that I've been secretly searching for, for quite some time. And, thanks to Mr. Brown, I found it. I found my personal perfect biscuit recipe. Confused? Let me explain. I was raised in the south, hearing tales of country kitchens and days gone by. Of the made-from-scratch delights of the southern kitchen. I think I could count on one time how many times I saw a box of mix in the pantry. Mom taught us how to make everything (even yogurt at one point) from scratch. This being the case, I always had a little trouble getting the homemade biscuits to come out the way I envisioned them. As I would later come to learn from a wizened southerner, every cook has to have their own, somewhat unique, biscuit method. Oohhhh.

So one day, I'm watching Good Eats. Why? Because the show is great. Alton likes to explain why chemical reactions and such produce certain culinary masterpieces or disasters. That's great, because I like to know why my experiments might not rise the way I'd hoped. Anyway, he gave out a recipe for southern biscuits, and I tried it. Several batches later, and my family still loves them.

Thank you Alton Brown!

I think the laundry should be about done . . .

random quote of the day . . .

"I'm sorry - the way the light is hitting the Ritz Crackers right now - I wanna weep." - Prof. Mark Callahan

I could try to explain the context, but it would still be random and strange. It's amazing I that just kept a straight face. Ahh, critiques.

indecisive

Oh, it's up to it again. The weather is flip-flopping back and forth heading from summer into fall. I have the mild sore throat/run-down bug thing to prove it. Or maybe from my schedule, or both? Who knows. I really wish it would rain though. Two home games in a row with no rain in between makes for some rather nasty sidewalks. Still, the sky looks amazing, and it's nice to keep the windows open in the morning. The cats love it too.

Going to find beverages before I drag myself to Jewelry . . . *where's the vitamin C?*

poor little Daisy

The fuzzy little puffball jumped too far and cut her lip open (yes, rabbits have lips). So I'm playing overprotective mom and making sure she's as comfortable and spoiled as possible tonight. Poor little bunn. She'll be fine though.

I have some pieces in an art show going up (tomorrow?) at Lamar Dodd. The show is a collection of works by fellow students in the Jewelry & Metals department. The first of a series. Check it out if you are near the UGA School of Art (main building). There are some unusual pieces.

Gearing up for the game this weekend . . . GO DAWGS!!! ;)

First up . . . hi Patrick! Thanks for the note on that post sweetheart. That email address is probably out of date by now. ;)

hmmmm . . . monday. Well, it's been smelling like fall for at least a week or so now, which is great. I love fall!

I read an article in Relevant dealing with art and the Christian culture "ghetto". Link to it here. This is an ongoing issue. Has the Church made for itself its own little cultural ghetto? A selling point for Christian radio is that it's "safe". So what, we isolate ourselves so that no one gets in with their messy lives? People still have problems even when they're IN the Church, so that seems the old ostrich head in the sand bit. Not to mention that the vast majority of Art currently created under the term "Christian" is significantly sub-parr. Some of the music is improving, but it's coming (mostly) from Christians who don't associate themselves with CCM. A lot of people may get offended, but maybe that's what they need.

I'm still working this out in my own head, but I do believe that your craft deserves the best possible effort on your behalf. Why settle?

a temporary home

My extended family faired this last hurricane rather well, and did not even need to evacuate as they had in the past. Today I met some who did have to flee, and are now making Athens their home for the time being. We chatted for a while, not on what is left of their home, but about life as it is now. They're welcome for as long as they need. One lady was amused to find that just as at Tulane, art supplies are cheaper at the campus bookstore.

not now . . .

why does this happen? I decide that school is important, and that I don't really have the time to date right now, and then this great guy (with a JOB, manners, and charm) is asking for my number and noting complimentary things when he enters it into his pda/Blackberry(?)/high-tech cell phone gadgety thing. I know, he let me watch while he entered it. Lord please help me. At least he doesn't live in any of the area codes that I work or live in. Now we'll just see if he calls. I'm not freaked out by him, so that's a good sign. I hope.

Oh, and my beloved Bulldogs (DAWGS) won tonight. Maybe it does go to show that if you sell your soul to the devil it does eventually come back to bite you in the ass (talking about the other team).

oh, of course . . .

hair and makeup went way too smoothly this morning. Actually, everything did up until I tried to start my car. Yes, tried. Dead battery. So, got mom to drive me over to Wally-world to get a new one after I hooked up the charger to see HOW dead the thing was. R.I.P. little battery.

Ok, so normally replacing a car battery is not too hard, and Saturns are pretty easy to do basic maintenance on. No big deal. Except that the housing/heat shield that protects the battery is about as easy to get off as an Orbit at the Tate Center stop. There's a lot of pushing, shoving, squeezing, and even yelling.

"Great, I'm gonna be covered in sweat."

"Aww. It's cold out this morning. No you won't," said my mother.

Guess who was right?

So the new battery is in, I took the morning off from class, and I'm all showered (again) and ready for work.

c'est la vie

it's in 401 and it's packed

Tonight was the first night of the new women's Bible study at my church. Don't worry, the men have one all their own as well. Well, they didn't put out enough chairs, and I wish I had a camera to capture the look on Miss Ellen's face. That wonderful woman was just surprised and elated all at once. Of course, one of my favorite moments would have to have been when Pastor Mel stuck his head in the door. That man looked shocked at number seated in the room. Or maybe it was that it was a room full of women but none of them were talking. This was during the "video" session, but still .

The under-thirty crowd has their own area in the back. It just kinda happened.

I want to punch Bill O'Reilly

and all of the other people who are blaming everyone else. Go out and give blood, cash, even your old suits for crying out loud!!! Do your best to help, and then maybe you'll have something to talk about.

Ok, so maybe the "punching" bit isn't very Christian of me. I'm stuck in the lab at the moment.

Seriously though, I wonder how much these people are actually physically doing to help the situation. A category 4 hit the coastline and obliterated it. Regular routes were blocked if not destroyed. People freaked out and started firing on others trying to help them. It's a nasty situation, but how does blaming everyone really help that at all? For now, the point is to do whatever you can to help.

help name the bunny

We have a new rescue bunny, but she doesn't have name yet. A couple found her (she's still a baby) on their way to the St. Mary's Emergency Room around 1am. They couldn't keep her, so I took her in. Anway, she has markings like a snowshoe hare, only a bit darker. More silver than white Very classic, very elegant.

Here's the list thus far . . .

Adelaide
Aspen
Clover
Daisy
Daphne
Lady Juniper Draonfly Babbette Koko Hiers (not really, but in honor of Ruthie & Josh, I listed this one. Bunnicula is still NOT an option.)
Penelope
Tali

sorry

hi everyone . . .

One the one hand, sorry for the lack of posts. However, life is keeping me quite busy, and more than a little worn out by day's end. It's a good thing in a way. I have several thoughts I'd like to expound on, but by the time I make it home and finish up the work for the next day, in-depth blogging is about the last thing I want to do. So, everything is bustling, but should be clearing soon.

Going to give blood again tomorrow (don't worry, it's been a while since the last time). Do what you can to help out . . .

first day

As much as I find annoying about the first day back at school (crowded buses, obnoxious freshmen, long lines everywhere . . . ) there are also things that make me happy . . .

• This is one of the shortest class days I'll have all semester.
• Buying school supplies.
• Having been in a department long enough to know 90% of my classmates.
• Catching up with said classmates and the three months worth of (let's be honest here:) gossip we've lived through since we saw each other last.
• This is my last year as an undergrad.
• It's one of the few times of the year that you don't have to pay for a paper, because they beg you to take a "free" one.
  
• Hearing the bus driver announce that "This bus is NOT making any stops at the residence halls, including Russel or Brumby," and laughing along with the other older students and faculty also riding ORBIT . . . priceless.
• Oh, and explaining to the new Art professor how gamedays at home actually work, why it is dangerous to work in the studio on those saturdays, and how many there actually are this year.
  

currents

An influx of people is nothing new around here. It's Athens, people come and go for as many reasons as you could possibly think of and then some. Still, the number that I've come across lately is interesting for a very specific reason - they say it was God telling them to come. Some of these people are still not sure that they even like this place, but they're here anyway. It seems that the prayers prayed years ago are being answered. Not as quickly or in the way that was probably intended, but the currents are moving differently now. A steady force this time. There's a calm within the force of the movement that bears no uncertainty. I think that when what is beginning becomes apparent we will be swept along with it. I heard my father say over and over again that the evidence of a true revival is that it is obviously, unmistakably the work of God. I'm starting to believe that what I saw almost ten years ago happened that very day, and it has taken this long for us to be ready. Some of it has not happened though. In order to live without fear of demon or spirit, we must know who we truly are.

While we hope that peace will come to the land that cradled the people of our faith, such a place receives contempt for that very reason. Still, we owe our brothers and sisters our prayers and support. Whatever the outcome of human action, there was a purpose for every interaction.

it would be so much easier

if I was much less particular about the variations in color tone. I'm serious. I've been trying to decide on a color for my new bedroom for . . . oh . . . weeks now. If one shade is too green, then the other is too grey, or too pastel. And that's before I try the sample in the various lights, which change EVERYTHING. It's fun being an artist. Now granted, I still have to strip the old wallpaper, which can't be done until saturday at least. Why can't I decide on the wall color?

At least, five months after we started demolishing the dining room and kitchen tile, the new wood floors are finally going down. Oh yeah, and I finished redoing the bathroom.

ok, enough venting, so back to obsessing over paint chips . . .

friendships

I love Relevant. This article got me thinking about my own friendships.

At some point you see how really bad some of us are at supporting each other when things get rough. Not that make the friendships (or people) any less, but just because that's how it is. The first time or two it really hurts - BAD. But it's the whole picture you have to look at, and eventually love, because you're just as screwed up in your own endearing way. I have learned that within my circle of friends there are certain people to turn to for comfort, others for advice, and some to give me the kick in the ass that I need from time-to-time. Not that I don't keep them all informed, I just don't take it personally when they don't call back right away, or the day after.

But let me take a moment to point out that there is a difference between a friend and an acquaintance. An acquaintance would be someone you know, as in you recognize them and a couple of facts pertaining to them, but who you don't actually know. There IS a difference. Some of you in certain cities are still just figuring this out.

the places you least expect

Women's fashion magazines generally get a pretty bad rap as far as intelligent content is concerned. They’re plenty entertaining, and I've even watched guys reading them. But you just don't think of them as a place to get serious, relevant information on anything, except maybe fashion fads and makeup.

So here's the deal . . . why is it that these magazines are the ones to tell us the stories that the major news sources don't seem to have the guts to say? This month's GLAMOUR has an interesting little article on a woman who escaped (yes, ESCAPED) the CULT that is the Church of Scientology. She actually had to leave the country for a little while. Nice, isn't it? This is just a recent example though. Years ago, sometime before the whole Y2K, I read an article (in Vogue I think) about the oppression of women in Afghanistan. It explained how these women who had been doctors, professors, and teachers, were stripped of all of their rights, even healthcare, under a new regime. This was years before 9/11 happened and Americans as a whole took any notice. This is only two examples people. There's plenty more.

So what's the deal? Why don't we see more of this? I'm talking depth here, not just a summary. What gives?